As it turns out, diligent readers of this site will notice that TODAY was actually the S'posed To Be First Day of School. But there was this thing where... complications. Like, we had some friends that wanted to join us for a day trip to the Sequoias, which sounded awesome, so we postponed, then those same friends got some sickness in them, aaaand whatever we just decided to still postpone anyway.
Pretty sure it was the most homeschool-y homeschool thing we've ever done. First day of school? Meh. Fuhgetaboutit. More like, try again tomorrow, amiright? HA.
And tomorrow, it's Game Time. But guys, for honesty's sake, my head is a little bit spinning. Ya see, I had this plan for how this upcoming year was going to go. I got the books, and the world's largest day planner, and I've reviewed last years mistakes, and I'm ready to go. My kids are gonna learn this year. Like SUPER learn.
And then last week, we had this 24 hour long stint of refusal and tantrum. Over a 15 minute long reading worksheet. 24 hours of screaming and yelling and sitting on the floor spitting darts from her eyeballs. It was one of those particular kind of rough days that leave me feeling like, well, a failure. Like we're 2 whole years into this adoption story, and somehow we're in the same place we were when we first started. She was broken. I was broken. And I just couldn't imagine starting into another year.
I sought help. I sought advice. And I got advice. I got some stuff I've already tried, some stuff I should try, and some stuff that was just, well, pointlessly rude. But the thing that stood out to me the most was this:
Academics will come.
Meaning? Well, family first. Heart of the child first. Bonding first. Because yes, Math is important, History is important, Reading is important... but if I don't have her heart, if I don't have her trust, if I can teach her to add, but forfeit her soul, then what, exactly, have I gained?
So we're starting homeschool again tomorrow. And I'm taking that last bit of advice, so once again, we're playing it by ear. I don't know what the year will look like, but I'm going to do my best to make it safe. And loving. And fun. And occasionally, maybe even academic. And ya know what? I'm still going to try my dangdest to use that giant planner.